the Free Hypnosis Social Network
PTSD
My daughter has a friend that just spent the last year helping out in India, Egypt, and Israel as a volunteer with orphans. She stopped over tonight and at the age of 22 she has seen and been through in the last year things that no-one her age should have to.
She has come back with the classic case of PTSD from what I understand. She wakes up in the middle of the night remembering her friend from college being shot in the arm, she wakes up remembering the time when she was in a group bombarded with tear gas and as she crawled away unable to see, when she finally was able to wipe her eyes with alcohol wipes which they kept on them for these occasions she saw two more smoke grenades coming at her.
She is currently is suffering with a bacteria which they haven't been able to identify that leaves her week and the 10 days of antibiotics they put her on made her vomit and have diarrhea constantly. She was telling us twice it got so bad she was literally dry heaving for an entire day so that her mom almost took her to emergency.
She is unable to talk to her parents or family about what she's been through, they can't deal with it. She says there are days she is as angry as hell, other days she just feels empty . She told me she feels guilty about if she goes out with her friends, that when she laughs it's hollow just a sound coming out of her mouth and even then when she comes home she feels guilty.
To me this sounds like PTSD but I wanted to get input from any of you that have worked with this. I would also like any and all suggestions on how to work with her. To help her to sleep without the night terrors. To once again feel alive.
After talking with her for 2 hours at which time she told me that she had told me more then anyone else except for one friend I asked her if she would consider letting me try to help with hypnosis and she said anything. I then said, so after all the horror, starvation, sleeping on the streets, putting yourself between a soldier and a child to protect the child, having dysentery, cholera and now this thing that you currently have would you do it again? Without missing a beat she said Yes
I really have no clue where to start I just know that I want to help her. So any and all suggestions, scripts etc would be gratefully received.
Bonnie
She has come back with the classic case of PTSD from what I understand. She wakes up in the middle of the night remembering her friend from college being shot in the arm, she wakes up remembering the time when she was in a group bombarded with tear gas and as she crawled away unable to see, when she finally was able to wipe her eyes with alcohol wipes which they kept on them for these occasions she saw two more smoke grenades coming at her.
She is currently is suffering with a bacteria which they haven't been able to identify that leaves her week and the 10 days of antibiotics they put her on made her vomit and have diarrhea constantly. She was telling us twice it got so bad she was literally dry heaving for an entire day so that her mom almost took her to emergency.
She is unable to talk to her parents or family about what she's been through, they can't deal with it. She says there are days she is as angry as hell, other days she just feels empty . She told me she feels guilty about if she goes out with her friends, that when she laughs it's hollow just a sound coming out of her mouth and even then when she comes home she feels guilty.
To me this sounds like PTSD but I wanted to get input from any of you that have worked with this. I would also like any and all suggestions on how to work with her. To help her to sleep without the night terrors. To once again feel alive.
After talking with her for 2 hours at which time she told me that she had told me more then anyone else except for one friend I asked her if she would consider letting me try to help with hypnosis and she said anything. I then said, so after all the horror, starvation, sleeping on the streets, putting yourself between a soldier and a child to protect the child, having dysentery, cholera and now this thing that you currently have would you do it again? Without missing a beat she said Yes
I really have no clue where to start I just know that I want to help her. So any and all suggestions, scripts etc would be gratefully received.
Bonnie
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Michael Ellner on -
I am happy to help
212-580-3471
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Permalink Reply by Kevin Cole-NLPTrainingQuest.com on -
You will be in good hands with Michael, and I'm certain he will emphasize the fact that we NEVER want to give a diagnosis to our clients, especially one such as PTSD.
Of course it sounds like she's dealing with some stress, probably brought on by the her experience, and again I'm sure Michael will emphasize that a certain degree of stress from such a trauma is quite "in order" as opposed to being a "disorder".
In addition, I'm sure he will help you out with some desensitization tools to help her overcome the stress, along with others that will help her overcome the guilt you mentioned she is dealing with.
Handled correctly, she'll be doing great in about 1 to 4 sessions. When you call Michael, you'll have some quality guidance. You probably won't need it after talking with Michael, but feel free to contact me as well if I can be of assistance. I've worked with this sort of thing a lot... 619-602-3633
And as a side note, your client has my utmost respect!
Stay Well,
Kevin
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Permalink Reply by Kevin Cole-NLPTrainingQuest.com on
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P.S. Although I know Michael is not a huge fan of it (it's just not his style, unless I'm mistaken), one of my favorite tools to use with those suffering from post traumatic stress- especially related to war- is EFT. It's one of the most elegant "tools" in my "tool box" and it allows me to even use it over Skype with soldiers overseas... Much safer in cases of intense trauma than traditional hypnosis...
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Permalink Reply by Michael Ellner on
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Hi Kevin,
You are mistaken -- I am very open to using EFT-like approaches to help clients.
I just think that it sucks that so many hypnosis/NLP practitioners don't realize that EFT is a very effective form of unacknowledged hypnosis
Warmest regards,,
Michael E.
Kevin Cole-NLPTrainingQuest.com said:P.S. Although I know Michael is not a huge fan of it (it's just not his style, unless I'm mistaken), one of my favorite tools to use with those suffering from post traumatic stress- especially related to war- is EFT. It's one of the most elegant "tools" in my "tool box" and it allows me to even use it over Skype with soldiers overseas... Much safer in cases of intense trauma than traditional hypnosis...
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Permalink Reply by Kelley Woods on -
Bless you, Bonnie, for being a source of relief for this amazing young woman. Be assured that just being a compassionate listener will help her. In addition, following direction from Michael and Kevin will further enhance your ability to help her heal. The one suggestion I might offer is to play on that confession she made about not regretting her experience. That is a powerful one that can be turned to a positive resource.
Thank you for sharing this story: it demonstrates (again) the great need to help people who have endured traumatic events and how people in our profession might help them.
Best wishes,
Kelley
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Permalink Reply by Kevin Cole-NLPTrainingQuest.com on
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ah... Thanks for clarifying, Michael... And I agree that it's definitely an unacknowledged form of hypnosis/nlp and not just about meridians.
My take is that it involves...
*A form of anchor collapsing/ pattern interrupts
*A form of creating new -resourceful anchors
*Very specific language patterns
*Positive affirmations
*And yes, of course energy work via the meridians points
And I do believe that understanding more of how the first 4 work within EFT (or other similar "tapping/eye movements") will allow those that use it to hold considerably higher success rates.
Michael Ellner said:Hi Kevin,
You are mistaken -- I am very open to using EFT-like approaches to help clients.
I just think that it sucks that so many hypnosis/NLP practitioners don't realize that EFT is a very effective form of unacknowledged hypnosis
Warmest regards,,
Michael E.
Kevin Cole-NLPTrainingQuest.com said:P.S. Although I know Michael is not a huge fan of it (it's just not his style, unless I'm mistaken), one of my favorite tools to use with those suffering from post traumatic stress- especially related to war- is EFT. It's one of the most elegant "tools" in my "tool box" and it allows me to even use it over Skype with soldiers overseas... Much safer in cases of intense trauma than traditional hypnosis...
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Permalink Reply by Kevin Cole-NLPTrainingQuest.com on
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Ask and you shall receive... Just not yet. Give me till later tonight to expand further. I think every practitioner should understand this better anyway...
-Kevin
Jha-en said:Kevin Cole-NLPTrainingQuest.com said:
My take is that it involves...
*A form of anchor collapsing/ pattern interrupts
*A form of creating new -resourceful anchors
*Very specific language patterns
*Positive affirmations
*And yes, of course energy work via the meridians points
Kevin, this makes a lot of sense to me intuitively. I don't suppose you could elaborate a bit on this understanding of how the first 4 work? ...doesn't hurt to ask, right? :D
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Permalink Reply by Kevin Cole-NLPTrainingQuest.com on
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EFT (and other "tapping techniques") and what really makes it effective (according to Kevin Cole at least)...
1. Anchor Collapsing: When you think about something "negative" and "tap" - this is a form of an anchor collapse/pattern interrupt. One of my favorites parts is what's called "The Gamut Point", which involves moving the eyes in all directions- very similar to the highly effective NLP technique "Eye Movement Integration" which I also believe to be another form of an anchor collapse.
2. Language: When you tap while saying "Even though I feel _____________, I deeply and completely love and accept (or deeply and completely forgive) myself, you are using language to say "Even though..." something happened- and lets think about that simple "even though" statement is saying- linguistically... It's saying "Well, this happened, BUT it's OK because I deeply and completely love/accept and or love/forgive myself".
Then during the next "round", when you've gotten whatever the negative emotion and or physical sensation down to a lower level, you modify the language accordingly by saying "Even though I still feel some of this _____________ , I deeply and completely....
Then when you've gotten rid of the "negative" emotion and or physical sensation completely, you modify the language even further with yet another round saying, "Even though I used to feel _____________, I deeply and completely....
Can you see how the language helps in collapsing the anchors we sometimes hold from the negative emotions and or physical sensations we were feeling?
Which leads me to...
3. Affirmations: Yes, "I deeply and completely love/accept and or love/forgive myself is in fact an affirmation. One that you want to be cautious of actually, because this is one factor that can make or break a "tapping" session of any kind... If they are going to be saying that affirmation, make sure they know what it feels like to love themselves and make sure they are feeling it as they say it! You will get tremendously better results.
And as a side note, these "affirmations" also address what I believe to be the most significant factors to 99% of un-resourceful emotions -and often times even physical challenges as well... Self Love & Forgiveness (Forgiveness of Self & Others).
4. Establishing positive anchors: By doing 1,2, and 3 (along with of course allowing the energy in our bodies to flow more freely via the different meridian points (which aren't necessary- BUT are very helpful in my experience), simply "Tapping" becomes a very positive anchor- So long as you've done it right...
There's more to it of course, that wouldn't be practical for me to get into here, but those are the core elements.
I encourage people to check out different forms of "tapping" in the form of EFT, Thought Field Therapy, and the other forms that are out there, but the above should give you a pretty solid understanding that will enable you to gain better results with your clients.
That said, I used to say that EFT was so simple that it was almost impossible to do it wrong. Again, I used to say that until.... I saw some Youtube footage where a woman simply tapped on the different meridian points saying to herself "I'm so depressed, I'm so depressed, I'm so depressed", believing that simply tapping on the different meridian points alone- while saying that she was depressed (while looking down most of the time, I might add) was supposed to help. What I witnessed was a very depressed woman causing herself to become even more depressed and anchoring in that depressed feeling by not understanding what she was doing. She certainly didn't appear anything other than very depressed by the end of that youtube clip.
So now I say, it's almost impossible to do it incorrectly as long as you understand 1 through 4 above and... have had live intensive training/experience in NLP/hypnosis. **Now, that said, I have come across some EFT practitioners with no formal training in NLP or hypnosis that were very good at what they do. However, understanding 1 through 4 above -or more of the "Why tapping works"- in my experience- and their feedback, has always helped them gain considerably better results and go from "good" to Excellent...
Stay Well,
Kevin
Kevin Cole-NLPTrainingQuest.com said:Ask and you shall receive... Just not yet. Give me till later tonight to expand further. I think every practitioner should understand this better anyway...
-Kevin
Jha-en said:Kevin Cole-NLPTrainingQuest.com said:
My take is that it involves...
*A form of anchor collapsing/ pattern interrupts
*A form of creating new -resourceful anchors
*Very specific language patterns
*Positive affirmations
*And yes, of course energy work via the meridians points
Kevin, this makes a lot of sense to me intuitively. I don't suppose you could elaborate a bit on this understanding of how the first 4 work? ...doesn't hurt to ask, right? :D
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Permalink Reply by Melissa Tiers on -
Hi Bonnie, I would also use a lot of EFT and possibly the Tapas Accupressure Technique (www.tatlife.com )
I would then dissociate to the troubling memories and recode them. Many different processes can do this. An easy one would be a version of the visual-kinesthetic dissociation patters (fast phobia cure) or you could do a time line reimprint and resource. I like to take clients into a state of expanded awareness, similar to the ultra=height state and from there view the incidents from a much more resourceful place. This allows your client to have a broader perspective and from this expanded scope, she can change the way she feels and remembers these incidents.
It's also a great state of mind for a healing the physical symptoms as well. You can simply have her come up with a visualization for healing that will allow her immune/endocrine system to interpret as a boost.
Hope this helps,
Melissa
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Permalink Reply by tc_Burt on -
You can simply put forwarrd "I accept myself"
Jha-en said:Hi Kevin,
Thanks so much for taking the time to outline this. I'd never thought of the tapping as being a form of collasping anchors - but that does make sense. I also really like the gamut sequence - the eye movements in particular. I've played around quite a bit with eye movements - that makes sense that the eye positions in particular are anchoring a thought/feeling state.
I find that a lot of people have a problem with the language - at times it can be difficult to say "I deeply and completely love and accept myself" or whatever version. As you suggest, if they can't access that feeling state then it doesn't work quite so well. I tend to prefer TAT (Tapas Acupressure Technique) in that case or I borrow that wording in some modified form and use it with tapping. In either case, the best results I find come from tapping on parts :)
Thanks again,
~Jha-en
Kevin Cole-NLPTrainingQuest.com said:EFT (and other "tapping techniques") and what really makes it effective (according to Kevin Cole at least)...
1. Anchor Collapsing: When you think about something "negative" and "tap" - this is a form of an anchor collapse/pattern interrupt. One of my favorites parts is what's called "The Gamut Point", which involves moving the eyes in all directions- very similar to the highly effective NLP technique "Eye Movement Integration" which I also believe to be another form of an anchor collapse.
2. Language: When you tap while saying "Even though I feel _____________, I deeply and completely love and accept (or deeply and completely forgive) myself, you are using language to say "Even though..." something happened- and lets think about that simple "even though" statement is saying- linguistically... It's saying "Well, this happened, BUT it's OK because I deeply and completely love/accept and or love/forgive myself".
Then during the next "round", when you've gotten whatever the negative emotion and or physical sensation down to a lower level, you modify the language accordingly by saying "Even though I still feel some of this _____________ , I deeply and completely....
Then when you've gotten rid of the "negative" emotion and or physical sensation completely, you modify the language even further with yet another round saying, "Even though I used to feel _____________, I deeply and completely....
Can you see how the language helps in collapsing the anchors we sometimes hold from the negative emotions and or physical sensations we were feeling?
Which leads me to...
3. Affirmations: Yes, "I deeply and completely love/accept and or love/forgive myself is in fact an affirmation. One that you want to be cautious of actually, because this is one factor that can make or break a "tapping" session of any kind... If they are going to be saying that affirmation, make sure they know what it feels like to love themselves and make sure they are feeling it as they say it! You will get tremendously better results.
And as a side note, these "affirmations" also address what I believe to be the most significant factors to 99% of un-resourceful emotions -and often times even physical challenges as well... Self Love & Forgiveness (Forgiveness of Self & Others).
4. Establishing positive anchors: By doing 1,2, and 3 (along with of course allowing the energy in our bodies to flow more freely via the different meridian points (which aren't necessary- BUT are very helpful in my experience), simply "Tapping" becomes a very positive anchor- So long as you've done it right...
There's more to it of course, that wouldn't be practical for me to get into here, but those are the core elements.
I encourage people to check out different forms of "tapping" in the form of EFT, Thought Field Therapy, and the other forms that are out there, but the above should give you a pretty solid understanding that will enable you to gain better results with your clients.
That said, I used to say that EFT was so simple that it was almost impossible to do it wrong. Again, I used to say that until.... I saw some Youtube footage where a woman simply tapped on the different meridian points saying to herself "I'm so depressed, I'm so depressed, I'm so depressed", believing that simply tapping on the different meridian points alone- while saying that she was depressed (while looking down most of the time, I might add) was supposed to help. What I witnessed was a very depressed woman causing herself to become even more depressed and anchoring in that depressed feeling by not understanding what she was doing. She certainly didn't appear anything other than very depressed by the end of that youtube clip.
So now I say, it's almost impossible to do it incorrectly as long as you understand 1 through 4 above and... have had live intensive training/experience in NLP/hypnosis. **Now, that said, I have come across some EFT practitioners with no formal training in NLP or hypnosis that were very good at what they do. However, understanding 1 through 4 above -or more of the "Why tapping works"- in my experience- and their feedback, has always helped them gain considerably better results and go from "good" to Excellent...
Stay Well,
Kevin
Kevin Cole-NLPTrainingQuest.com said:Ask and you shall receive... Just not yet. Give me till later tonight to expand further. I think every practitioner should understand this better anyway...
-Kevin
Jha-en said:Kevin Cole-NLPTrainingQuest.com said:
My take is that it involves...
*A form of anchor collapsing/ pattern interrupts
*A form of creating new -resourceful anchors
*Very specific language patterns
*Positive affirmations
*And yes, of course energy work via the meridians points
Kevin, this makes a lot of sense to me intuitively. I don't suppose you could elaborate a bit on this understanding of how the first 4 work? ...doesn't hurt to ask, right? :D
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Permalink Reply by Michael Ellner on
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Using affirmations that result in inner-conflict do not help and may harm...
My long term AIDS survivors didn't like the affirmations used in conventional EFT - but could get into tapping -- So - I recommend doing the tapping to:
"I am in great shape for the shape I am in and I expect to get better"
The above affirmation didn't seem to violate any of their deep felt feelings and beliefs... and people reported they found that lighthearted expression of their very serious challenges helpful...
Michael E.
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Permalink Reply by Kevin Cole-NLPTrainingQuest.com on
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Ah... I see many are concerned about the affirmations... (although in the case of AIDS survivors, I like Michael's modification. Saying "even though I have AIDS (and possibly dying)- may or may not feel at all appropriate for a client to say. He's worked with a lot more AIDS client's than I, so I'd take his experience to heart there.)
That said, for most other issues- and even the issue of AIDS, this is why it's so crucial that they actually feel what they are saying... Otherwise, Yes, you are correct that they can do more harm than good. And yes, for many... Saying "I deeply and completely love and accept/forgive" myself can be challenging... If it is, the way I see it, you just struck gold because you are now aware of what's really going on and can help your client overcome it.
Again, 99% of the time, what we're dealing with is a lack of Self Love & Forgiveness... Help them achieve that, and the affirmations will go very smoothly...
See attached for one of my favorite methods of assisting clients in achieving this. (Although there are other methods as well and as someone else mentioned, Timeline re-imprinting can be wonderful with this. **I strongly suggest making sure they have the resources first, before taking them down that Timeline. It will make the ride considerably smoother for you and your client).
As someone that works a great deal with severe trauma survivors, I highly recommend understanding how crucial Self Love & Forgiveness is and discover as many ways as possible to help your clients experience it. For me personally, it's the foundation of all of my work. Start there, everything else is just easier... Much easier...
Stay Well,
Kevin
Michael Ellner said:Using affirmations that result in inner-conflict do not help and may harm...
My long term AIDS survivors didn't like the affirmations used in conventional EFT - but could get into tapping -- So - I recommend doing the tapping to:
"I am in great shape for the shape I am in and I expect to get better"
The above affirmation didn't seem to violate any of their deep felt feelings and beliefs... and people reported they found that lighthearted expression of their very serious challenges helpful...
Michael E. - Attachments:
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