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Collapsing anchors for fear of flying?
I'm really new at hypnosis, but I have a colleague who is going on holiday tomorrow and she's asked me to help her with fear of flying.
I've just been discussing this with her and it turns out it's not so much the flying, but a fear of sharks from seeing "Jaws" when she was small - she's afraid the plane will fall into the sea and she'll be eaten by sharks!
I don't feel at all confident to attempt the fast phobia cure at this point. I have tried collapsing anchors on other people (without hypnosis) with great results, and I'm thinking about trying this under hypnosis to anchor a peaceful, relaxed state which her boyfriend can then trigger if she starts to panic.
I'm going to try this after work tonight before they leave. Anyone have any thoughts on this, or ideas to get the best result?
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Paul Ramsay on
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Do what you feel most confident doing, Claire. Confidence is so important when working with folks. If you have serious doubts about doing the fast phobia fix, it's going to come through in how you do it.
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Permalink Reply by Claire Hemmings on -
Confidence is the biggest issue for me, especially as most of the people I have an opportunity to try things on are in my office! If something fails, everyone will know and it'll make it harder next time.
I'm still at the practice stage, but when people see me sticking hands to desks etc, they expect miracles from me! I have a queue of people with weight problems, smokers who want to quit and people with phobias. It's hard to appear confident when I know I can't tackle a lot of this yet.
If I try and fail, people will stop believing I can do it.
If I don't try, people will think it's because I don't believe I can do it, therefore they won't believe I can.
So getting this right tonight is really important.
I know this should work... I need to just get on with it and stop doubting myself!
Paul Ramsay said:Do what you feel most confident doing, Claire. Confidence is so important when working with folks. If you have serious doubts about doing the fast phobia fix, it's going to come through in how you do it.
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Whoa, Claire! Look at all the limiting language you're using on yourself here!
"If something fails, everyone will know and it'll make it harder next time."
Is that really the case? Why would "everyone" know? Do your clients all network with each other? Come on, Claire. They don't all run around and tell each other! And you say it as if something fails, that's it; there's nothing else you can do. Failure is feedback! Don't just frame it to yourself that way; frame it that way to the client! "Ok, now we know this method doesn't fit your situation, so let's use a different approach."
"they expect miracles from me!"
Yes, this is often the case, but that's their expectation, not yours, right? Don't let other people's expectations define how you approach your work. YOU are the one they came to for help. YOU know more about using hypnosis for creating personal change than they do, or they wouldn't have come to you. YOU make the rules, and you re-set the expectations.
"It's hard to appear confident when I know I can't tackle a lot of this yet."
How dare you use the c word! Are you properly trained or not? Claire, don't confuse skill level with skill set. If you're properly trained, then you have the skill set. Maybe your skill level using these tools and techniques isn't where you want it to be, yet, but they are two completely different issues. Work within your training. Walk before you run.
"I know this should work... I need to just get on with it and stop doubting myself!"
Now that's the first sensible thing you've said in the whole post! Get on with it. HAVE FUN helping other people. It's a blessing to be able to do so.
-Paul
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Permalink Reply by Claire Hemmings on
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You're absolutely right, Paul! I must stop doing that...
Paul Ramsay said:"If something fails, everyone will know and it'll make it harder next time."
Is that really the case? Why would "everyone" know? Do your clients all network with each other? Come on, Claire. They don't all run around and tell each other!
Actually, they do. The only people I have available to practice on are my colleagues, and they all talk to each other!
But what I'm doing tonight will definitely work, and she'll be able to tell everyone how relaxed she felt on the plane!
(Better? ;-) )
As for working within my training, I know I can hypnotise because Jonathan Chase taught me, but all the techniques for dealing with people's issues I'm teaching myself from books & the internet. There's a lot of conflicting information out there... which is why I'm here!
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Better :) I could tell you that you're getting better at what you do every day, but I think you understand this already :)
Be well, Claire.
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Permalink Reply by James Malone on -
Claire, I use the collapsing anchors technique with the client in trance frequently to good results for a wide variety of fears.
During the pre-talk you can coach her on the idea that the protective part of her subconscious mind usually does an effective and useful job. However in this situation it is creating a false alarm by treating a situation that is "possible" yet is highly improbable.
You can also future pace and have her imagine she has already landed from her flight and it went even more smoothly than she expected and she was ready to enjoy the rest of her holiday.
Also, create a simple post hypnotic cue she can use like every time she rubs her thumb and forefinger together she relaxes completely or she can slowly breathe in relaxed confidence and breathe out any tension that try to linger, etc..Lastly you have to express your confidence to her that such fears are overcome routinely-you have to imagine her success before she does! Good luck! Jim
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Permalink Reply by Kelley Woods on -
Hi Claire,
You will do great. I suggest that, to insure this, you use Michael Ellner's Emotional Detox Technique: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d7xp-hacrwo&feature=player_embedded
I use it before and between clients, whenever I become aware of tension coming into me. I also teach my clients how to use it to "re-boot" themselves anytime. It's quick and easy and quite effective...
Best wishes,
Kelley
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Permalink Reply by Michael White on -
Well, a couple of things...
First, I'd practice the "Fast Phobia Cure" on your fear of using the "Fast Phobia Cure". This will have two benefits a. fear gone (obviously) b. you will have a deeper understanding of how it works so you can use this tool to help others.
Know that you will learn it as well as your ABC's! Trust me, it's cake once you get that "OHHH! Boy this is easy!" feeling.
Secondly, since you haven't mastered it, I think it is very wise to use what you know. You want to live outward your inner mastery so your friend gets the most benefit.
Now...you cannot guarantee that her plane will not plummet 10's of thousands of feet through the air, crash in the ocean and that she would would survive and actually be something that a shark would want to eat. That is a possibility. Highly improbable, but I guess something worth being afraid of. Kind of arrogant if you think about it.
Anywho, There are a lot of different ways to do this, it make me think about women that have little fish eat dead flesh off their toes. They PAY for this!
There is a shark that fits in the palm of the hand. Look it up. Have that one and only that one be allowed to eat her.
If I was working with her I'd say (while she was in the deepest and most pleasurable trance), "Okay, the plane crashed, you survived! Yes! There's petrol in the water and luggage floating everywhere! You've inflated your little life vest but you had to blow them up. Your life jacket is one of the dumb ones!
Okay! The sea is calm everyone's all right pretty much but they feel like screaming because it just seems like the right things to do. Go ahead, scream a little
(I'd make her scream a little she should be laughing by now we're playing pretend here)
And your floating along la la la la feeling a little guilty that you survived but not really when all of a sudden you feel the slightest little nibble, the tiniest little enjoyable nibble at your toes. Eensy weensy little nibble and you think to yourself:
OH MY GOD!! I'm getting a SHARK PEDICURE!!! The wee little sharks are going to make sure her toes look great for the news cameras!
When we can laugh at our fears, we can change them forever!
Have her make "Jaws" a tiny fashion conscious toe nibbler. Have her do this twenty times, Twice for each toe!
Have her see her getting the pedicure in the calm ocean while lazily floating along after the ahem...horrific plane crash...but you get my point, make it fun for her so she giggles to herself the whole flight!
And you have fun too!
A
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Permalink Reply by Claire Hemmings on
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Thanks everyone! Well, I tried magnetic hands on her earlier and it worked well, so I was able to tell her she had a great imagination and therefore would be easy to hypnotise. Sure enough, she went out in seconds!
I'm not sure I'll ever get used to the expression on people's faces when I collapse the anchors :)
Future paced so she could imagine getting off the plane after an easy & comfortable flight, excited about her holiday.
She ran back into the office and told everyone it was great, weird but really fun. I told her boyfriend how to fire the anchor for the safe, peaceful feeling in case she still gets stressed, but I'm not sure he'll even need it. When I left them she was still buzzing, telling him all about how great it felt ("And then my arm just floated up by itself, and I wasn't doing anything!!!")
I'm still buzzing, too. Confidence levels way up! Once I got started I said all the right things, and didn't get tongue-tied as I was afraid I would.
I LOVE this!
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Permalink Reply by Cheryl Westley on -
Congratulations on a successful session!! :-) Keep up the magnificent work!!
...I used Faster EFT (via IM) to help a friend with flying/turbulence fear the other day. For this person it was more a fear of heights and "falling". EFT repetitions brought the person back to the initial sensitizing event, and we released the original anxiety and left them with a state of calm. I heard back not long ago -- the flight was uneventful and relatively stress-free. :-)
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Permalink Reply by Stephanie Voss on -
Well done, Claire.
Can you share more specifically what you did to collapse anchors on this issue?
I haven't had great success with the Fast Phobia technique. I usually use a Body/Mind technique and with my current flying client just induced and then anchored to three deep breaths a wonderful sense of calm. I focused on teaching her how to trigger this calm for herself with three deep breaths and then and future paced the calm while traveling: beginning at home making travel plans, to packing a bag, to the car ride to the airport, to the security line, etc, going back any time anxiety reappeared. This did quite well and client even reported three great nights of sleep -- but I'd love to hear more about your approach.
And nice job on the arm raising! Convincers convince both people in the session....
cheers,
Stephanie
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