Weight Management Issue. Venting and asking for advice.

I am just looking for some creative and new advice. I have been working with a gal whom I believed I was leading in a successful direction (she was originally so excited about her responsiveness to hypnosis) until about 3 weeks ago. We are having 1 weekly session at this point. We have an appt. tomorrow and she just emailed me to say that tomorrow was going to be our last session. “Maybe I was looking for something magical, I don't even know. But after trying to get off the last few pounds for years, it is just a matter of will power and smart choices. If hypnosis doesn't work, that was kind of my last frontier. It is not any easier now for me to pass up those evening snacks than it was 2 months ago when I started. It was difficult to say no then, and it is still difficult to say no. “
She has always admitted to disliking gyms and exercise so we have also dealt with motivation issues. Over the last two visits she admitted that she has coffee in the morning and doesn’t eat until dinner. She wasn’t admitting that in the beginning. No wonder she craves and overeats at night. I spoke to her about both of these topics and was just recently able to focus on the latter of the issues due to her lack of honesty with me. She was VERY resistant to the fact that she needs to keep her body fueled throughout the day. She just strongly stated that “I could never eat throughout the day or I would really be overweight!” I told her that apparently not eating wasn’t working for her or she wouldn’t be requiring assistance. I had already covered that topic back in the beginning of our session work and she opted to not tell me that was one of her major challenges. Now she is planning to quit after tomorrow and I am not sure how to speak to her to get her to move forward at this point or if she is just too resistant and I should let her go. I am feeling a bit sensitive this evening so I thought that I would vent. To have someone leave on that note (when I have had so many others succeed) only to say that hypnosis “didn’t work for them” happens to be bothering me this evening and I just thought I would see if anyone has anything that they think I should attempt to introduce on this “apparent” final session? Even some new parting words of wisdom in support of hypnosis would be appreciated. I will look for any feedback anyone has to offer up until 1PM tomorrow (Wed.) and even then I am sure that I will appreciate your feedback after the fact.

Favorite

0 members favorited this

▶ Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by David Mason on July 28, 2009 at 5:56pm

Take a deep breath.... think green thoughts.... calm.... peaceful.... breathing gently... .

and now......

Picture yourself near a stream.

Birds are singing in the crisp, cool mountain air.

Nothing can bother you here.

No one knows this secret place.

You are in total seclusion from that place called the world.

The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of silver notes.

The water is crystal clear. So clear,

You can easily make out the face of the person whose head you're holding under the water.

There now, feeling better?

Dave Mason
www.hypknowsis.com

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Julia Mueller on July 28, 2009 at 6:04pm

I am taking a break watching a serious mystery movie and you would think that I was watching a comedy if you were listening outside my door. I needed that BURST of laughter!!!! Thanks...I needed that...any more suggestions??

David Mason said:

Take a deep breath.... think green thoughts.... calm.... peaceful.... breathing gently... .

and now......

Picture yourself near a stream.

Birds are singing in the crisp, cool mountain air.

Nothing can bother you here.

No one knows this secret place.

You are in total seclusion from that place called the world.

The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of silver notes.

The water is crystal clear. So clear,

You can easily make out the face of the person whose head you're holding under the water.

There now, feeling better?

Dave Mason
www.hypknowsis.com

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Roger Moore on July 28, 2009 at 6:08pm

Sometimes this will happen. You offer tools, but you can't make her use them or do what you suggest. I have received emails like this in the past - but often in their "last session" they make a breakthrough and then we move on from there. Have you done parts with her? What's the secondary gain? What is her compelling reason for releasing the weight? Right now she is more invested in not eating all day and snacking all night than she is at getting to her goal weight.

If she does leave tomorrow without future scheduled sessions does not mean that she won't be back.

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Karen Lockman on July 28, 2009 at 6:19pm

Hello Julia:

Have you done regression with her? Find out why she doesn't like her image, but refuses to change it. Secondary gain? Who took the sweetness out of her life? Maybe she feels strong in the day (erroneously believing not eating is strength), and then gives in and overeats at night to fill up the emotional emptiness? How about putting her in front of her reflection... not her physical appearance, but the reflection of the person she thinks about when she thinks about herself, and inside that reflection are all the feelings and emotions she doesn't like and wants to keep hidden from the world, intensify feelings and regress, find out age, what happened and who are the players. Do inner child work and change perception of the event. Then chair therapy: It's essential to face those who may have hurt her, release the anger, pain, hurt or guilt and do the forgiveness work. Then forgiveness of self for elimination of guilt. Build up unconditional love of self and self-respect. This will then allow her to eliminate the need to change any part of her body to be happy, but then because she loves and respects herself, she will now show respect for the body by educating herself on which is the healthiest eating style for her, and only those foods which show respect for her in the proper quantities and with the proper nutrition and in the right timing will be put into her mouth. Now her body will start to change to reflect that self-respect. Then you can build up exercise habits as respect for the body. It may be accepted at this point.

Karen

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by John Cleesattel on July 28, 2009 at 7:19pm

Julia,

She has just proven that if she keeps doing what she has been doing, she will keep getting what she has been getting. Hypnosis is not a magic pill. It doesn't take away free will. If it did, we would be starting with the bank accounts LOL.

Weight loss requires an increase in activity, and smart nutrition, along with any motivation or enabling. I feel it might be best to turn her loose. If she won't follow instructions, there is nothing you can do for her.

John

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Craig Homonnay on July 29, 2009 at 1:57am

Hi Karen
I now use that method with every weight loss client after seeing Bob Brenner do it in his internship program ....usually only need 2 sessions IT WORKS !!!

actually I seem to use it for everything these days :)

Craig

Karen Lockman said:

Hello Julia:

Have you done regression with her? Find out why she doesn't like her image, but refuses to change it. Secondary gain? Who took the sweetness out of her life? Maybe she feels strong in the day (erroneously believing not eating is strength), and then gives in and overeats at night to fill up the emotional emptiness? How about putting her in front of her reflection... not her physical appearance, but the reflection of the person she thinks about when she thinks about herself, and inside that reflection are all the feelings and emotions she doesn't like and wants to keep hidden from the world, intensify feelings and regress, find out age, what happened and who are the players. Do inner child work and change perception of the event. Then chair therapy: It's essential to face those who may have hurt her, release the anger, pain, hurt or guilt and do the forgiveness work. Then forgiveness of self for elimination of guilt. Build up unconditional love of self and self-respect. This will then allow her to eliminate the need to change any part of her body to be happy, but then because she loves and respects herself, she will now show respect for the body by educating herself on which is the healthiest eating style for her, and only those foods which show respect for her in the proper quantities and with the proper nutrition and in the right timing will be put into her mouth. Now her body will start to change to reflect that self-respect. Then you can build up exercise habits as respect for the body. It may be accepted at this point.

Karen

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Julia Mueller on July 29, 2009 at 5:30am

I just want to thank everyone for their responses. All so true and good suggestions. Many of them I have utilized and would go into more depth if she stayed on. I will continue to monitor any additional responses until about 1PM.

Again,
Thank you. I love Hypno-Thoughts. It makes me know that I am a part of a wonderful group of professionals.
Julia

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Julia Mueller on July 29, 2009 at 5:54am

I truly hear you John.

John Cleesattel said:

Julia,

She has just proven that if she keeps doing what she has been doing, she will keep getting what she has been getting. Hypnosis is not a magic pill. It doesn't take away free will. If it did, we would be starting with the bank accounts LOL.

Weight loss requires an increase in activity, and smart nutrition, along with any motivation or enabling. I feel it might be best to turn her loose. If she won't follow instructions, there is nothing you can do for her.

John

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Doreen Cohanim C.Ht on July 29, 2009 at 8:12am

Hello Julie,

I understand that you want to help your client with weight loss, most weight management client come with serious issues and skepticism, because they had done most of the diets and nothing worked for them, and If It did work, then they did gain all all the weight back and even more.

Building a rapport is really important and It must be done in the first session.

Hypnosis is not a quick fix or a magic pill, hypnosis is a vehicle and your job is to teach your client how to drive, basically to give them the appropriate tools.

Why is she fat or over weight?

Why does she want to lose weight?

How Important Is weight loss for her?

Is she on medication?

Is she suffering from any illness, such as thyroids, heart conditions, depression, diabetics, etc...

Does she drink alcohol?

Is she in a bad relationship that anger, stress, resentment are a major trigger?

Was she always over weight?

What is the weight she wants to loss?

Is It realistic, is it 10 lbs, 20lbs or much more?

How is her eating habit?

How is her Sugar Intake?

How is her water Intake?

How is her sleeping pattern?

If she was slimmer, what size, or weight she was before?

What happened when she lost weight? did she like it, etc...

Once you have a total Information about her,then you apply hypnosis.

She must understand that that it takes time, and six session is needed for her mind to start delivering results, and maybe that's all she need or most likely much more.

Commitment is also serious, have her sign a contract with herself, that she wants to lose weight, have her write it.

In hypnosis suggest relaxation, motivation, energy booster, new self image, have her see her self in her dream weight desire...

Hope this was helpful, also are you a trained hypnotherapist?

Weight loss requires a doctor referral, especially If it is more then 20 pounds.

Doreen Cohanim C.Ht
Certified Hypnotherapist & Energy Healer
www.EnterYourMind.com
www.HypnoCruise.com

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Julia Mueller on July 29, 2009 at 11:30am

Thank you Doreen. Yes, I am a trained Hypnotherapist by the NGH with other certifications and continuing studies through NGH, IACT and the IMDHA. I have actually created a Hypnotic Coaching Weight Management program called "New Beginnings" . I am aware of all that you offered and I know that I have built in a very extensive "intro to hypnosis" and repor building segment into the program. I was just venting to fellow Hypnotists over this resistant client that has not even been honest with me about her eating habits until last week. Weight Management is a challenging area, of course. I have really appreciated everyones helpfulness and I do love Hypno-Thoughts. It is a wonderful asset. In what state do you practice? We do not require a doctors referral for weight loss(management) and frankly, I have not run into anyone who says that they do? I do get doctors referrals but as far as a requirement, I do not feel that need to send someone back to a doctor if they come to me for weight loss.
Julia Mueller

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Doreen Cohanim C.Ht on July 29, 2009 at 12:06pm

Hello Julia,

I am glad that you or o the top and that you are a trained Hypnotherapist, I just wanted to make sure, since hypnothoughts It's not only for hypnotherapists... and to be honest, It is a great place to vent out as well.
I am from California and I also do workshops In Israel, where I a currently at.. ( here In Israel I do not do Hypnosis, since It is not allowed by the health department, unless the hypnotist is a doctor.

As to a doctors referral for weight loss(management), I was thought It was needed, I studied at HMI, and I personally agree with it, since over weight people are usually on medication and spacial diet is really important for them.

It is to protect yourself and your client and also to make sure your client is supervised and receives the best care that is possible.

Just my experience...

Respectfully Doreen Cohanim C.Ht