Which issue to address first?

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Permalink Reply by Michael Ellner on October 4, 2009 at 4:11am

If a client comes in with multiple goals -- I usually tell them that the key to their success is recognizing that the only thing between them and their goals is a "stuck state" and I offer a very effective 4 to 10 session program that will help them get unstuck and reach their goals.

You can easily guide your clients through my HOW TO GET UNSTUCK program and use each session towards achieving their goals. Be aware that unless you are a licensed mental health professional -- "treating" depression could get you into hot water. On the other hand when clients become more confident and address their other "issues" many report that their depressive feelings lift all by themselves...

Visit: www.quantumfocusing.com for more info on HOW TO GET UNSTUCK

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Permalink Reply by Beryl Comar on October 4, 2009 at 4:28am

Hi Sue
I agree, this happens a lot. You could follow Mr Green's ideo-motor responses (very nice) I shall give that a go.
I ask the client in the pre-talk how they sleep and "multiples" always sleep badly so ask if it's OK if we start there - after all everything seems so much better after a good night's sleep doesn't it? (Hear the embedding Sue?) I have never met anyone yet disagree with that.
I regress to cause (usually affect bridge) on the sleeping and fix those issues - informed child technique, forgiveness, parts etc.
Clients have found that the other issues such as depression "melt away" after wards.

Beryl Comar
Dubai

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Permalink Reply by John Cleesattel on October 4, 2009 at 6:03am

Welcome Sue,
Most clients who come to you will have a "laundry list" of things they would like to get help with. Establish that they all can be addressed, but each individually. Let them know how much you charge per session and then ask them which issue they feel needs attention first and go from there. The one session at a time scenario is a good one to follow.

I hope this helps you
John

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Permalink Reply by Hugh Cole on October 4, 2009 at 6:28am

Hi Sue,
Multiple issues are not uncommon. and the presenting issue is usually not the real reason they want to sit in your chair. One of the first things I do with everyone is a series of process I call negativity clearing. These are content free ways of allowing them to personally deal with negative memories thoughts and associations that are root causes of many problems. Mark Cunningham's "cottage" process and Brian Phillips "Garbage Can" process are good examples, but there are many more. After that the laundry list gets considerably shorter and you can work on specifc issues in future sessions.

Hugh Cole
The Pretty Goodest Hypnotist on the Planet

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Permalink Reply by Mary Vallei on October 4, 2009 at 6:34am

Hello,
Most problems start with one experience, or series of experiences, so too there is a "core of intention" into which all desired changes also fall. In the first session, begin with implementing re-framing and that the client already knows the answer is critical to successful change that can encompas all the issues a person seesm to have. After listening intently to the issues described, and acknowledging the depth of the experience, start reframing by saying something along the lines of "regardless of how many issues you see within your life, the important thing to remember is that they all come into one thing- positive change; so instead of thinking that you have an overwheling number of things to work on, you really have only one---creating positive change in yourslef and in your life, and you have the ability within to create exactly that. Take each issue presented and ask "if you no longer had this what would you be, or have, or what would your life look like...". Take that and help the client frame those things into a sentence or two that describes the desired change. For example, a person may say something like, "if I was not depressed I would be happy and free, or if I was not overweight I would be healthy, etc.

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Permalink Reply by Mary Vallei on October 4, 2009 at 6:40am

PART TWO OF VALLEI REPLY----Guess there is a limit on number of words in a reply1?

Anyway, after the person desdies on what the "core of change or intention" is you can tell the person that all issues fall into this. You begin by working on the intention first. you set the positive message and build confidence the first time and get the person to "see" the total positive future that encompasses all the changes they want to make. Tthen in next sessions you continue to include the core of intention but you also then start working on each issue directly wahtever they are (weight, money, etc.) What order depends on what the client is experiencing and how deep different issues are and how much they are affecting his/her life. You ask those questions at the start and re-visit each session so you can create and adjust your approach.

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Permalink Reply by Bruce Taylor on October 4, 2009 at 1:23pm

I think I would regress on the feeling that had everything to do with why she was there and proceed from there. Take each issue as it comes along. Many problems are tied together as you pointed out. I would let he subconcious lead you to what issues to resolve first.

Bruce Taylor

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Permalink Reply by Mark Tyrrell on October 5, 2009 at 4:02am

Certainly we need to decide with rather than for the client what changes they'd like to make first. Sometimes we might also need to manage expectations as when people expect all and everything to be instantly cured, I might talk in analogy about how we wouldn’t expect to "leap the staircase" and can comfortably take one step at a time.

Generally we can focus (if the client agrees) on what will make the biggest difference the quickest. So if someone is, say, depressed but suffers a crippling phobia of some kind we could sort out the phobia first which in turn of course can:

A; Ramp up faith in you that you'll help their other difficulties and
B, Have beneficial ripple affects on their other problems as they may have been depressed about the phobia and so forth.

Then again depression, which used to be known, way back when more descriptively, as “nervous exhaustion” is caused and maintained by anxious rumination (1) so dealing with anxiety is also, in affect, dealing with the symptomology of the depression, which in turn will also affect sleep quality and even pain response as serotonin levels and pain perception are intricately linked (2)

Again when depression starts to lift, because serotonin plays a role in determining depth of slow wave sleep often quality of sleep will improve because we are treating the depression effectively.

So, of course, as you recognize, what seem to be lots of different conditions are often the tentacles emanating from the same thing.

All the best

Mark


(1) Though depressed people often present as ‘flat’ and inactive their blood levels their blood levels of the stress hormone cortisol are much higher than normal. See: Nemeroff, C, B (1998) ‘The neurobiology of depression. Scientific American, 278,6, 28-35
(2) Depression as well as suppressing immune function reduces serotonin levels which modify pain response. See: Author: Sommer, Claudia Molecular Neurobiology, Volume 30, Number 2, October 2004 , pp. 117-125(9)

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Permalink Reply by Jack Hirsh on October 5, 2009 at 9:05am

Bruce,
This is exactly what I was going to recommend. Right from the teachings of Cal Banyan, Steve Parkhill and Jerry Kein. The subconsious has all the answers the client is looking for and as Parkhill points out Chronic illnesses quite often are traced back to one ISE.

Bruce Taylor C.Ht said:

I think I would regress on the feeling that had everything to do with why she was there and proceed from there. Take each issue as it comes along. Many problems are tied together as you pointed out. I would let he subconcious lead you to what issues to resolve first.

Bruce Taylor

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Permalink Reply by Pattie Freeman CH.t, MST on October 5, 2009 at 4:26pm

usually if there is one they are connected on some form..but find out what is more important for them to accomplish then maybe the other issues would come together after the major one is resolvedl.

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