Buzz Bleeds From His Own Big Bite!

This past weekend was a lot of fun. Most of it was spent either in an airplane, a van or a hotel room with very little sleep - but, still a great time.

However, it wasn't without it's trauma. Conveniently located next door to the Best Western I was staying at, was a brand spankin' new Boston Pizza - one of my favourite restaurants. Friday night I had their Jambalaya Fettucine, Saturday's lunch was a Buffalo Chicken sandwich and then a late night pizza on Saturday evening. The trauma I'm referring to came from the chicken sandwich.

The long & short of it is, I cut my mouth on the damn thing! No, there were no bones, no razors embedded within it. The cause was two-fold: 1) Large bun. 2) Toasted.

Because of the size of the sandwich I had to stretch my mouth open as wide as possible. Combine that with the toasted shard of bread that cut in to the side of my stretched open mouth and - voila - I'm bleeding like a stuck pig!

At first, I thought it was just a messy sandwich, but I soon realized that trickle running down my chin was not from the ripe tomato. I tried to look as inconspicuous as possible while eating and bleeding. I held the napkin to the side of my mouth, but it was a lost cause. I got the rest of the sandwich to-go and went back to my room.

I thought, "Great, I'm due for a sound check at the venue right away and my mouth is bleeding - from a sandwich!" I didn't know what I should do, but the only thing I could think of was how boxers get vaseline smeared over their cuts during a fight. So, lacking vaseline, I pulled out my Chapstick and smudged it all over the cut. Amazingly, that seemed to help!

So, I'm happy to say I survived the sandwich incident, but a word of advice to restauranteurs everywhere: If you're going to offer over-sized sandwiches on your menu, you may wanna think twice about toasting them...It could be a huge liability. At the very least, include some sort of advisory or warning.

Upon ending this blog, I just recalled, I never ate the rest of the sandwich. Some poor guest of room 108 at the Innisfail, Alberta Best Western is going to have a nice surprise when they open the bar fridge!