PNEUMATOLIGICALLY SPEAKING--The Art of Having a Dialogue, January 7, 2001

It is a beautiful-January day here at 6 King's Inn Trail, Thornhill, just north of Toronto

AGREEING TO DISAGREE, AGREEABLY

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Graham--a friendly and diplomatic poster here at www.hypnothoughts.com --in his recent communication reminded me of how important it is, for all of us, to be interested in one another and to be willing to take the time to understand and practice the art of communication with one another.

The two-way communication of information and ideas has always been a deep interest of mine. So much of what happens to us in life depends on it that I am sure I do not need to belabour its importance.

Of course, it is always easy and enjoyable to have a friendly chat.  

But we also know that many a friendly chat in the family--even in the community at large--can, because of how easy it is to miscommunicate with one another, be turned into a family, or community feud, with all kinds of unforeseen consequences, including acts of criminal violence. The front pages of our papers, daily, are filled with such news.

BTW, I do not find this site all that easy to navigate. Am I the only one?

Friendly Chats, unfortunately, can easily, and often do--especially after too much beer, wine and the like--become nothing more than loud debates filled with attenuated arguments about who is right, or who is wrong. In addition, any number of ad-hominem attacks can occur:  "YOU... you are nothing but a $TUp1d A$$ #0l3=! YOU... you-A$$ are to blame for the F&n-me$$ the whole 6%*&*^% family is now going through ... 

OK, ENOUGH OF THE PROBLEM. LET'S TALK ABOUT SOLUTIONS USING THE SOCRATIC METHOD

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By the way, to date me: I was born on Jan. 14, 1930. Allow me to confess: In my youth, I loved to debate and, at every opportunity, I made use of my loud bass voice. In my university years--1947-1951 & 1953-1955 (postgraduate-studies)--I loved the "bull" sessions. To me they were lively, enjoyable after-hour talks usually held in our rooms, or on residence floors. Because, in my opinion. we were reasonably pneumatogically mature, non of these bull sessions ended in any other than verbal violence.

But I am reminded, it took me quite a while before I came to understand that there is a wide difference between having a debate and a dialogue.

Eventually I came to accept that debating is a zero-sum game; there has to be winners or losers. Providing the people involved, as I already indicated, are what I call "pneumatologically mature"--[Any time, ask me about 'pneumatology--this can be a useful tool in dealing with serious public policy issues and communicating ideas to the public.]

My becoming aware of the nature and function of debating led me to prefer the Socratic, or the dialogue method. Why? Because it is a more spirit-based, gentle, loving and diplomatic way of communicating--any idea, including some very deep and serious ones.  

In a dialogue every one is entitled to, and respected for, their opinion. There should be lots of opportunity for interaction, for questions and answers, with no dogma and no intention that the answers be thought of the definitive and final. 

I like the quip about diplomacy: It is said that a diplomat is one who is able to tell his opponent: Go to HELL! And he does in such a way that it makes his opponent look forward to the trip. 

OK! Anyone: What will it be? A violent argument? A debate? Or a dialogue? I await your response.

Me? I encourage the use of the Socratic method, dialogue. Of course I will also express my opinion and I will share my ideas and my experiences with all who ask. Also, I welcome yours. If I fail to be fair, please tell me. If I offend anyone, I will be more than willing to apologize. Let us share some great ideas and learn from one another.

Yours in the Now, 

Lindsay, at  

www.lindsayking.ca

905-764-1125

By the way, I am not opposed to hypnotherapists ask ing for a just fee, especially when they give people the kind of physical, mental and spiritual--somatic, psychosomatic and pneuma-psychosomatic--help they need. Of course no ethical therapist should ever make claims beyond what they know that they can deliver.

Do I charge fees for pneumatherapy? No. Because I have the good fortune of having a modest preacher-kind of a pension--after over 40 years of pastoral ministry--there is no fee for (time permitting)  what I call "pneumatherapy", which is self-hypnosis without the hocus pocus. It can actually be given over the phone.

Meanwhile, feel free to ask me about the Family Life Foundation  www.flfcanada.com   It is a volunteer-operated charity and is registered here in Canada. It is designed to help families, especially those plagued by bad physical and mental health and are trapped in poverty. . 

In Canada, donations to the FLF are tax-deductable.