Understanding the Basic Structure of the Volcano of Anger

The human race are animals, and like all animals we act on instincts, we are emotionally attached to our environment. Our social structure, common traditions and collective interests teach us how to be human. As children we learn right from wrong, we learn our organised beliefs and experience the companionship of our community teaching us to be accepted by our society.

Some emotions are more socially tolerable than others. Anger is the least accepted emotion. It is socially acceptable to express happiness, but not extreme anger.

• Right to be – Happy
• Wrong to be – Angry

Because of our social beliefs, we suppress and avoid, neglect and hide our anger, until it overwhelms us and becomes out of control.

Emotional demands – responsibilities, worries, conflicts

Mental signs – The conscious replaying of the situation or situations that has caused the “Emotional Demands”, that repeat endlessly without conclusion or solution.

Physical signs – The physical state or states caused by the “Mental Signs” and “Emotional Demands”, which may frequently result in disturbed sleep, poor nutrition, pain and possible illness.

Behavioural signs – The outward behavioural manifestation of the three states above, that can range from a simple raised voice, all the way to physical violence.

Raw Anger – The uncontrolled release of the emotional, mental, physical and behavioural states, aroused by real or imagined offences, accompanied by the desire to retaliate.

Controlled Anger –The ability to identify and contain the emotional and mental states, whilst demonstrating the ability to find a socially acceptable and positive conclusion and solution to the situation/s

Now that you understand the basic structure of how we deal with the four triggers and the two resulting states of anger, take a moment to reflect on what you have learnt from this tool. What stands out? Have certain parts of this tool helped you to identify elements of your situation? Where does your anger come from? Can you recognise your types of anger? Which of the four triggers have been the hardest to accept, that you have? (These triggers may need the most attention.)

We are all aware that there are appropriate and inappropriate ways to express anger. To help answer the above questions, list five ways you have expressed inappropriate anger and five ways you have expressed appropriate anger.