Inducing hypnosis in family and friends

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Permalink Reply by Woodrow on April 12, 2008 at 5:15am

Hello Roger.

Elman encourages people to not practice on family and friends for the first month of practice. However, my wife and friends have allowed me to practice on them and I've been successful with them. And, Elman in his book, Hypnotherapy, discusses failing. He thought it better to succeed, fail, succeed, fail and in doing so, you learn by your mistakes much more than someone who succeeds 10 times in a row and then fails. Because then their confidence suffers and they may give up altogether.

So, don't be afraid to fail. It's only by practice that you become confident and successful.

Your fears are common, including myself in that group.

It would be good if you find a "meetup" group in your area or start one yourself with others who are interested in hypnosis. Then you can learn from each other and you'll have a practice partner. I admit that this is the hardest part of doing hypnosis. The beginning of your practice is tough. Your confidence is low, your clients are few.

My advice: Keep going. Keep looking for those who are interested in hypnosis like you. Venturing out in this new path isn't easy, but trudge on anyway. You have faced fear many times in your job. And you've overcome your fears. You've pushed through. Use that same approach with hypnosis.

If you practice on someone and they don't become hypnotized readily, try a different approach. If they have a hard time relaxing, use an analytical approach. Give their conscious mind something to do. Actually, this is the way I induce most people. Give their conscious mind a job to do, let their imagination itself induce them and then give them suggestions.

We are here to help you Roger. Feel free to continue to ask questions, even if you think they are dumb. Chances are your questions are not dumb. They are ones most of us have asked. If you need further help, feel free to send me a note.

Peace...

Woodrow

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Permalink Reply by Roger Harris on April 12, 2008 at 5:24am

Woodrow, that was very helpful.
Thank you very much.
Roger

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Permalink Reply by Richard Nongard - HypnosisGurus.com on April 12, 2008 at 7:28am

Roger,
Woodrow gave some great advice. Just keep at it, you'll do fine!

We're glad you enjoyed the Speed Trance Instant Induction videos, and want you to know that it looks easy because it truly is. Hypnosis WORKS.

What you appear to have is simply a lack of confidence, and that is something you MUST overcome, at least in your presentation style, to be successful. Your participants will pick up on your confidence (or lack thereof) and it will sway the mood and experience.

The worst thing that can happen is not that they look at you like you're a fool - but that you give up and quit!!

You should not fear failure when learning, for two reasons. 1) Hypnosis WORKS, and it will likely work for you just fine. 2) Failure is simply an educational experience, a chance to learn how to do it better the next time. You may have wobbled a bit the first time you rode a bike, but you tried a few more times and learned to adjust and correct, and then you were peddling down the road....

Like anyone, some of your friends and family may have misconceptions about hypnosis and be afraid that you will embarrass them and so they won't want to participate - but that's okay. SOMEONE will be supportive of your new interests and agree to help you, especially if you do a good pre-talk (what hypnosis is and isn't, the control you would and would not have over someone you hypnotized), and explain that you've learned some new techniques and you just want to try them out.

One of the great things about the Speed Trance DVD set is that it shows a "Third Time's The Charm" experience - where John tries one style with a girl who is nervous - it doesn't instantly take, so rather than givie up and reject her as a subject, he immediately goes into a different approach - that almost works but not quite, but serves to build her comfort level that this isn't scary or weird - so he goes right into a 3rd approach, and she instantly drops.

In this way, the first two times served basically as a "convincer" experience - and it worked.

And you should probably consider using a few "pseudo-hypnotic" convincers - like hand or finger lock, or lemon drop test, or 6 and a circle, or chin and cheek - with your friends before you do the inductions, as they are really great for loosening up participants, reducing anxiety, and building rapport and trust.

Just practice, practice, practice. Practice using hypnotic language on your pillow, in the mirror, while cooking breakfast. Get comfortable with the patter and movements, and then give it a shot. And then another, and another. Watch the responses you get when you do this or that, and make verbal or physical adjustments next time.

You are in a learning phase, where you are just beginning to master the craft. This is the practice stage where you try out what you've learned - so just go for it!

Hypnosis for Emergency Pain Management is a great thing, and it goes hand-in-hand with instant inductions. John Cerbone actually teaches a class for EMT's in New York for just this purpose. (http://www.hypnotistpro.com/hypnosis-career-training-programs.html)

So don't give up, and perhaps use the above concept as a way to get your buddies at the station to volunteer to help you out to learn to master these techniques.

Like NIKE says, JUST DO IT! And enjoy the amazement when it actually works!

~Paula
(HypnosisGurus.com Staff)
(800) 68-HYPNO

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Permalink Reply by Roger Harris on April 12, 2008 at 10:02am

Thank you Paula.

I have to say I am impressed and also relieved. I was concerned about the type of feedback I would get on this forum but it has been wonderfully constructive and helpful. Its evident this forum and its members care about fostering hypnosis and its participants, at all levels, and are a credit to the hypnosis community, that busy professionals take the time to assist burgeoning hypnotists is great.

Paula, thanks for the tip about Mr. Cerbone's emergency hypnosis. I will definetely look into it.

Roger

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Permalink Reply by Katherine Zimmerman on April 13, 2008 at 7:25am

Hello Roger,

First of all, your fears are certainly normal. I was nervous when I was starting out. I have a question for you: what is your goal with all this? Do you want to work with people privately? Do hypnosis shows or demonstrations for groups?

Woodrow's suggestion to start or find a meetup group is excellent. I am the organizer of one here in California and our meetings fill up 2 weeks ahead with new hypnotherapists, my hypnotherapy students as well as people like you who are simply fascinated with hypnosis. Their website is www.meetup.com. The link to my group is http://hypnosis.meetup.com/114/ which might give you some ideas.

I think that to be successful with hypnosis it helps to understand it inside out. If you don't already practice self hypnosis, find a good class and learn how to take yourself into hypnosis. A man took my class years ago who had spent 30 years practicing what he hoped was self hypnosis. The class helped him deepen the state and gave him confidence.

Since you're an EFT/firefighter there an excellent book, The Worst is Over by Judith Simon Prager that would be good for you to read.

When and if you can, take an in-depth hypnosis training in a good school, preferably 200 hours of in class training. My students benefit greatly from the demonstrations and supervised practice. In the meantime, try the eye fixation induction as well as the Elman induction and practice the "patter" on an empty chair if you have to. At least then you'll have learned what to say and won't fumble with that part!

Good luck and keep asking questions.

Katherine Zimmerman
www.trancetime.com

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Permalink Reply by Roger Harris on April 13, 2008 at 12:50pm

Hi Katherine,

At first my interest in hypnosis was just curiosity. As a high school student I read a library book on hypnosis and tried it out on my sister. I didn't know about suggestability tests, convincers and deepening techniques, and there weren't people around to ask questions, so I let it drop.

I couldn't even say what sparked my interest but I delved into hypnosis again and found I could get videos and that classes were even available.

As my interest truned into a strong desire to really take my training into a possible clinical setting I learned that my state, Indiana, regulates hypnosis. Furthermore Indiana has virtually quashed any chance of people becoming state certified due to their strict standards for an accredited school. The law was structured to accommodate one school, a private school, which is now closed. As much as I would like to start a hypnosis group, I need to see if doing so would violate state law.

The idea of states enacting hypnosis laws is a subject I am thinking about posting on the forum, so I will probably do that in within the week.

So at this point I am frankly fascinated with hypnosis, waking hypnosis and NLP and all of their possibilities and is something I enjoy learning about. But at this point my goals are undefined.

Katherine thank you for posting and I will look for Ms. Prager's book, I'm certain I will enjoy it.
And who knows, the possibility of say, like minded people getting together for an evening, and if hypnosis becomes the topic of discussion even better.

Roger

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Permalink Reply by Erik Blazynski on April 13, 2008 at 6:59pm

I think that you are best served by addressing this fear. If you are OK with failing then you can do anything. I think that you need hypnotherapy to address this fear. I am not kidding. If you email me we'll talk and I can make you a script and send you an MP3. I am serious. Then you can report back here and tell how you did. I like to get paid for my work, so you can pay me what you think it's worth.

Email me and we can set up a time to talk erik@americanhypnosis.com

-Erik

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Permalink Reply by Brian David Phillips on April 22, 2008 at 1:00am

Roger, given your twenty-plus years of experience as a firefighter and as a fire instructor, you might want to take a look at Emergency Hypnosis techniques that can be applied to your work. As far as practice, Elman's advice was because many folks hit resistance with family members or friends who "know" they are "just" learning. Unless you project absolute confidence, you can have a bit more difficulty getting things going. However, it's not impossible. Many folks find their spouses or friends are happy to experience some nice soothing relaxation and positive affirmations and will come again. Was the course you took in your area? If so, then contact some of the other local students and start a practice group. If not, you can still start one . . . go to some social network type sites for your area and post a query. All it takes is for one person to answer the query to have a practice group going. Of course, if you can get half a dozen of regulars then you're really good to go for varied practice. This also creates a nice support and share group. If none of the members are very experienced, that's okay too . . . you can choose techniques and alternate having a presenter and then everyone practices and has fun while learning and perfecting skillsets. There are some solid skillset lists at http://www.trancesociety.org if you need a "syllabus" to go from (or just use various books, webpages, or groups as inspiration).

Hang in there.

- Brian

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Permalink Reply by Dimittris on May 17, 2008 at 1:19am

Hi Rodger, and everyone else,
I've been interested in hypnosis for a while, I've just never really gotten round to actually committing some time to the subject.
But now I'm spending some time with some old friends, and i thought that it would be the perfect opportunity to practice on some of the new friends they've made. I thought that because they don't know me, yet a certain level of trust would automatically be established. a friend who's place im staying at let me practice for the first time on her, just so i could get the script and the patter sorted out. i was using the elman induction, and even though i was really nervous and ummed a little, she still said that she couldnt open her eyes after the first part of the induction. latter on i sort of fell apart and forgot things and mixed things up, but for the first part it worked!
Anyway, i think that it would be really cool if you got some sort of group going for beginners to help each other! computer-wise i know next to nothing, but a link or something would help a lot.

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Permalink Reply by Bruce Taylor on July 12, 2008 at 5:27am

When I took a course on hypnosis they suggested not practicing on family and friends because they know you are not a hypnotist and that you are only practicing. Because of this they are not good candidates because of their mind state. I took that as a challenge. I thought if they are difficult, then if I am able to succeed I will be very effective with clients. It was difficult as they said and discouraging at times. My wife giving advice on what I am doing wrong even though she did not take the course and other thing like that. However I got through it and my wife started to follow and would more often then not go into trance. It was kinda hit and miss until she watched me hypnotise a client and the client was a very good subject. This was a turning point as my wife goes into trance very easily since that experience. I guess she accepted my new found talent. After all that rambling I would suggest finding others to practice on but if you choose to hypnotise family be prepared to fail many times until you get them on bourd. I would also suggest as with anything you need to practice, practice, practice.

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Permalink Reply by Susan French on July 16, 2008 at 4:07pm

Roger, dear Roger,

No, you're not a wuss. You're just like most of the rest of us in the beginning. There is a fabulous book for you, called "The Worst is Over" by Judith Prager. It's all about using suggestions for accident victims (who are already in trance) and it's specifically for first responders.

But don't make yourself crazy by trying to do instant inductions from the gate. Email me off board if you'd like and I can probably whip up some suggestions for sticking your toe in the water. I have some really good scripts that don't require a lot of "convincers", which are not so necessary, especially if you're just starting out.

I think you should just get some comfortable progressive relaxation scripts (I have some)*** and remember that the person is really in a light state of hypnosis once they've closed their eyes and have made themselves moderately comfortable.

***I just noticed that you're bored with them...but...practice with that at least a little and then you can start getting the hang of the faster inductions. Cal Banyan has a series on Rapid Inductions with DVD and I think written material. It's pretty simple.

If you're freaked out, tell them in your pretalk that stage hypnosis and therapeutic hypnosis are different (and remember that yourself). Clients may not even know for sure if they are in hypnosis until a session or two. I have a color deepener that I got from Michelle Beaudry that's very effective for most people and they're under the table before they know it. Let me know if you want it.

Good luck. Maybe you can practice with some people here who also want to practice. I do hypnosis by telephone all the time.

Don't give up. Stick your toe in the water, however slowly. Let me know if I can help in any way.

Susan

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Permalink Reply by John Cerbone - The Trance-Master on July 16, 2008 at 7:11pm

Since you mentioned me, thank you, let add my 2 cents here.
Woodrow, Paula et .al. are on the money. Nice group of folks with great insights.
Here's some insights from me.
Richard has sometimes described me as a big kid (like an 8 year old) whom has figured out how to Hypnotize, and it's never occurred to me nor have I ever been told that anyone is not capable of being Hypnotized, so I therefore Hypnotize everyone I set out to.
Paula knows the video, she was there when we shot it. There had been folks with a few drinks in some of the shots, not easy to drop, but drop they did into Trance. Sometimes it's as simple as saying, OK, this technique has all to do with you and almost little to nothing to do with me. If you let them it's all about their relaxation and you are merely their guide / coach, they often let go easier.
It has been said, fear is an empty vessel with a hole in it, it holds nothing, it does nothing, you hold fear, you gain nothing.
In a great deal of my earlier training, I was initially told work slow, don't shoot too high, work with little companies, not big ones, etc. My life path seems to be one of a Baptism by Fire, I could write anther book on just that. I've walked into situations everyone told me I shouldn't do, The Learning Annex in NYC, a Small Stage Show for a music media mogul with 18 people in a mansion, usually, don't work with less than 100 people in a room, right on to in house Corporate Clinical and Stage Shows, for Fortune 500 Co.'s. I have hosted shows in th rain, outside in swealtering heat, with biting bugs, and once where the temps were in the 30 degree F range, drunks, you name it, I've done it, still not dead yet. Read my Hypnotizing a Rainy Day Post.
Your only limitation is YOU. Who told you failure was a concept? There is only Success or learning. There are no problems, only challenges, do not try, just do. Practice your self-hypnosis and wrap your brain around these concepts and refuse to make this life or death, make it fun, you are the Ringmaster, and the life of the party's fun. You are there to play, it's not brain surgery, it's Hypnotism, bring joy to it, the light of your joy vanquishes the shadows of fear.
Now go get 'em tiger!
Hypnotically,
John
AKA
The Trance-Master
Trance-Master.com

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