Confidence is the Number One Attribute for Success

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Permalink Reply by Erika Berg on July 1, 2008 at 1:46pm

This is such a great topic for discussion! As a newcomer, I'll be excited to hear what experienced hypnotists have to say. Thanks, Richard! :)

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Permalink Reply by James Hazlerig on July 1, 2008 at 2:21pm

I, too, am interested to hear what people have to say, but I thought I'd share a tool that I'm doing to help boost confidence. You may have heard of it: hypnosis. :-)

Today I wrote a script (which I'm planning to record and then use on myself) for instilling confidence in my abilities as a hypnotist. And from what you're saying, I don't need it as much as some.

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Permalink Reply by Jerry on July 1, 2008 at 2:49pm

I totally agree with this.

I'm not quite a beginner anymore, but nowhere near professional status. This is the exact issue I deal with when hypnotizing friends. If I've hypnotized someone before or used the script/induction/etc with success then I have much more confidence. It's getting that first experience under my belt that seems to be the hang up.

Anybody have any good ideas for what should be in the self hypnosis session for this issue?

thanks,
Jerry

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Permalink Reply by Scott Sandland, C.Ht. on July 1, 2008 at 3:00pm

Confidence is the name of the game, no question about it.

Obviously there is a lot to be said for the importance of repetition and experience to gain that confidence (not to mention insight, etc.) but there are other ways as well.

There is a process I learned called DTI (Deep Trance Identification) where you hypnotize yourself into, within trance, believe you are someone else. While you are that other person you identify yourself as that person with all their abilities and characteristics. Then you re-integrate back into yourself bringing with you whatever insights or perspectives that person has that allows them to be able to do what they do.

So if you watched Richard Nongard teach you how to do a rapid induction, for example, you could then hypnotize yourself into reliving that experience as if you were inside Richard's body, seeing everything from his perspective and thinking it through from his mind.

How great would it be for a beginner to have the same level of confidence as a seasoned pro?

I have a feeling others will expound on other virtues of confidence in our profession, as I am tempted to do. I have a client coming in any minute, though, so I will leave you with that single concept to play with.

enjoy,
Scott Sandland

ps- real quick note: Find a group where you feel safe and willing to practice and fail. This will help you break out of your comfort zone and try new things. Maybe even try to fail and see what heppens. Okay, gotta go.

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Permalink Reply by Richard Nongard - HypnosisGurus.com on July 1, 2008 at 3:52pm

I spent the first few years of doing hypnosis practicing hypnotic language patterns and patter with everything in my world. For exmaple, I would open my front door and mutter "Perhaps you will find it easy to open when I turn you left, or that opening wil be easier if I turn you right"...
(The forced suggestion here, is that either way it will be easy)
And so I walked aorund hypnotizing my car to start, my dog to eat, the refrigerator to feed me.... blah, blah, blah...
I suppose in many ways I have never stopped doing this, although I a better at concealing my muttering...

Scott also nailed it in that repatition bring confidence. If you have a success, build on it by IMMEDIATLY doing it again... that codes it into our subconsious mind as a success...

Now If I could only hypnotize myself to type as well as Scott....

Richard

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Permalink Reply by Robert Kirk on July 1, 2008 at 4:08pm

Oh no, I did the same as you Richard. On top of muttering I would go all out when riding in my car alone. Windows up, hypnotizing everyone I passed on the road. I helped them with weightloss, smoking, golfing, basketball, I even helped several with bedwetting. They just didn't know it.

Repetition, saying it out loud, using different voice patterns and tones, self hypnosis, I used them all. And still do......

So if anyone here has mysteriously overcome their procrastination or IBS, maybe, just maybe, I was cruising in your neighborhood.....

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Permalink Reply by James Hazlerig on July 2, 2008 at 5:52pm

Although I don't call it DTI, the script I wrote involves something kind of similar.

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Permalink Reply by Brian David Phillips on July 1, 2008 at 4:18pm

Quick and easy things to do to bolster confidence . . . run some simple patterns such as Swish, Six Part Reframe, 3D Mind, and the like. Pop yourself into deep trance and work with affirmations coupled with anchor resources. Deep Trance Modeling to identify with and model behaviors and attitudes of those whose resources you wish to take on board. Get out there and do the work. When working with my university students on communication skills, a number students experience butterflies before speaking (while Fear of Public Speaking is one of the most common fears in the US, it is far far more common on this side of planet) and I tell them to consider that the butterflies in the stomach are not always from fear but from excited anticipation. Reframe the concept of failure . . . it's all feedback from which we learn to get better. My daughter plays video games more than humans should as do most young people . . . when they play a new game they usually hit a pretty interesting learning curve where their character crashes and burns quite a bit and then things start getting easier until they master it. During that initial phase they may experience momentary fits of frustration but they get right back on that joystick and keep at it because the learning experience is actually part of the fun. The same thing goes for communication and hypnosis. The act of going out and giving it a go and finding out what works well for them is part of the thrill of the game of hypnosis. Go out and HAVE SOME FUN WITH IT!

All the best,
Brian

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Permalink Reply by Richard Nongard - HypnosisGurus.com on July 1, 2008 at 4:32pm

Another tip for beginners... NEVER tell people YOU are a beginner. Just step into the role of hypnotist, be the hypnotist, and hypnotize. No need to explain or justify....

If you want to be a confident hypnotist. Be one. Not tomorrow, but NOW....

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Permalink Reply by Doreen Cohanim C.Ht on July 1, 2008 at 5:15pm

Excellent topic Richard,

Oyee Vayee Richard... I live this nightmare day to day, Yes, This Monster named "lack of confidence", not with actual one on one clients, but really with friends, family & strangers... my main blocking points that I am having a hard time with are:

1.) Performing my first stage show.. I had two shows that I canceled on stage... :( since the crowd were mean and not supportive.

2.) Hypnotizing strangers on the street for those doing entertainment. ( I did on the workshop with Brian David Philips, Felt Yucky within myself .. even though I did it, I wasn't satisfied... It wasn't good enough for me, I felt I was watched... lol I honestly felt spooky.... David did an awesome work he even gave me suggestions that worked for then, after that it was over for me...

Richard rumble did an excellent work on his training, and every one else beside me have been practicing stage hypnosis with an ease except me... Thanks Richard... One day I will make you proud lol until then I shell stick in doing some more clinical work.

In the past I also had a hard time charging money for those first sessions in my first and second year of practice, got over that .....

What is strange, is that I have never had any problem preforming group hypnosis for the public up to 85 people, as long as it wasn't for a stage hypnosis....

I have seen well known stage hypnotist hypnotizing me for this specific issue building my confidence, but sadly with no luck, I also had re-printing and age regression with no luck? whats wrong with me?

PS: I am not confident enough to do some stage hypnosis & tricks on my clinical clients? I just won't do it, won't dare...

Now deep inside I am sure I know what is my fear, It is not being able to say the correct sentence and wording fast enough without an accent, for some reason I feel that I will do it wrong and it will kill the show... that goes as to my native language, having the fear that I will forget what to say and will mix Hebrew and English together and again rune it, does that make any sense?

Or maybe I am not ready for stage hypnosis and this is truly my passion...

Doreen

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Permalink Reply by Richard Nongard - HypnosisGurus.com on July 1, 2008 at 5:47pm

Doreen, you have the technical knowledge, and even some experiences. I would suspect the lack of confidence comes from still wondering if you will fail becasue you fear being able to 'remember" everything when onstage. Start with some small skits, demonstrating phenoma like John Cerbones Red Pen, and then keep adding a few thing.

Writing out the routines for a well scripted stage show, picking the order, the skits and the music will help you feel like you have the show down. You have the skill, just do it! :) It is OK to tape the list of skits to the wall or floor, I've even done that in Vegas!


Richard

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Permalink Reply by Doreen Cohanim C.Ht on July 1, 2008 at 9:24pm

Thanks Richard

You are correct, I do have the technical knowledge, and even some experiences. But as soon as you pointed out the add ON steps after advising me to start with small skits, " here where I went" total blank and fearful...
>>> Here it goes...picking the order, the skits and the music... yes.. the music, the sound, the speakers? how M I going to know them, use them, it becomes all of the sudden too much work, over whelming.... scare me to death.... and you thought it should help me feel like I have the show down.

You see what my brain does to me? Yes, I do have the skill, But Can't just do it! :(

I feel like a baby that is afraid to be left alone... It's not funny.. I am laughing only because I know it sounds so ridicules to feel like that... but I can't help it...

It feels too much of a hard work that I will fail to do... so why do it?

Doreen , ( Hiding behind my computer screen )

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